Mod. 6.3 - Journal: Reflections on Your Tiny Transformation

Now that you've experienced a tiny personal transformation, make a journal entry reflecting on what emerged for you, using the prompts below.

• What did you notice about yourself, the experience, and the outcome of the situation? What was different?

• How did envisioning and practicing your Natural Paradigm serve you?

• Do you feel you are your best self when you are experiencing and expressing the elements of Natural Paradigm? How? Why?

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What did you notice about yourself, the experience, and the outcome of the situation? What was different?

In the middle of a tense situation with a difficult guest, I quickly learned how to identify their grievance and address it through actionable expressions of service with the full knowledge that I wouldn’t be getting a tip from them. Knowing that my managers trusted me and would support me when I identified a difficult guest allowed me to be able to apply an indefatigable spirit in the face of adversity because I knew my strategy of kindness was far better than seeking a form of retribution or punishment.

How did envisioning and practicing your Natural Paradigm serve you?

Undergirding each of my interactions with guests as a server was an understanding that the guest has walked into our house. That we have an experience and a type of service that we offer and it may not be the type of service you are accustomed to, or even appreciate, but it’s what we do. Patrons would walk on to our territory thinking they were the honored guest who can ask for and do whatever they wanted, and we didn’t want them to think otherwise. But in the event that the unspoken social rules of engagement were broken, the Natural Paradigm of trust allowed me to outplay and out-service difficult guests in a way that became legendary across NYC’s restaurant scene.

Do you feel you are your best self when you are experiencing and expressing the elements of Natural Paradigm? How? Why?

In those moments, I did feel I was my best self because the principles of the Natural Paradigm were in place to support me completely. I’ll never forget one occasion in which I had guests who had a vendetta against me to prove that my over-service and kindness would not be good enough. They ran me ragged asking for every minuscule thing they could. My teammates recognized the signs and stepped in to assist to help ease the burden off my shoulders so it wouldn’t impact my other guests, and the table began running them ragged too. After about two hours of this table completely compromising the experiences of every other guest in the restaurant, my manager came to the table and said “I want to thank you for coming in this evening and ask that you leave the restaurant right away. Your bill has been taken care of and no additional service will be provided. You have completely disrespected and actively undermined our team’s efforts to provide you with an excellent dining experience this evening in a way that was intentional and disgusting. All of the names, phone numbers and email addresses you provided to us have been logged into our ‘do not serve’ list and have been shared with every restaurant manager in the surrounding area. You will not be given a table or served at any establishment nearby. Please leave immediately.”

To be supported in a public way by my manager at that moment, alleviated all of the stress that the table had caused, and allowed me to finish up the rest of the service without any other issues. And because my manager made this declaration in proximity to other guests, the entire restaurant stopped talking and listened to what was happening. When the guests got up to leave, the entire restaurant cheered and waved goodbye to the jerks as they walked out. Their response reinforced just how special of a restaurant Union Square Café was at the time and served as one in a series of many examples of how the Natural Paradigm will work to overcome the toxicity of the Conventional Paradigm.